Friday, June 10, 2011

He who controls the horse controls the horse

"He who controls the spice controls the universe!"

Geez Louise, who is controlling the ~~spice~~ gas these days, anyway? The price has been so terribly volatile this past year, and usually heading up at an accelerated pace, but lately the whole thing is weirding me out. The prices are going down and that's a good thing - except when they bounced back up by four cents, for just one day, then started to glide back down.

I have to pass four different 7-Elevens on my way to the office, and a fifth one when I drive to the courthouse, so I am something of an expert on the price of gas there.

More from the cruise:

June 1, 2011
"Be one with the horse . . . "

The last time I rode a horse was almost 50 years ago. I was a kid and it was what turned out to be my last summer at Camp Anawana in Monticello, New York. I always liked horseback riding, although I do not care for horse racing nor do I really like horses, and I think "playing the horses" is a really bad idea.

But today's shore excursion was pleasant, despite getting rained upon for a little while - we were walking in a rain forest after all. Shopping in Belize is nothing much (good rum cake sample) and I've given up hope of finding my "First" cologne by Van Cleef & Arpels. I'll just have to go back to Nassau. Funky Nassau.

We continue to follow the Casey Anthony trial. Oy Oy Oy . . .

I hate to say it, but this lovely vacation is more than half over. And I have 2 trials starting next week upon my return.
Reality bites.

June 9, 2011

I keep killing off Doctor Who and Amy, and it is starting to get to me. I rarely play video type games, but this was such a an interesting little app for the iPad and I am such a Fan of Who, I wanted to try it. Sorry to say that the Doctor has "died" so many times due to my careless fingers, that he has used up all of his lives and simply won't be regenerating any further.

I had been craving mushroom and barley soup for several days. I don't think I've made it in over 20 years, although I used to make it with some frequency when we were young and freezing. Now that we are old and toasty, soup didn't happen too often until just a few years ago. Anyway, it was mushroom and barley I was craving, and I made it, and it was grand. Of course I will post the recipe on the other blog. You will love it.

One trial down, one to go, before this wild, wild week is over.

June 10, 2011

"Sittin' here restin' my bones, and that loneliness won't leave me alone, two thousand miles I've roamed just to make this ~~dock~~ parking lot my home . . ."

Wait, that's not right - although I am sitting in the parking lot at my former (and Rob's present) office, under a tree, all the doors and windows in the car open in an attempt to capture whatever errant breeze wanders by. It is lunch time, and I am between witnesses in an all day trial. The UTI continues to plague me despite the liberal consumption of antibiotics, and is making me feel generally run down. I am hopeful that I will be able to head home at the conclusion of today's court hearing, and catch a nap. Or nap with a cat. In my house, it's all the same.

Gas prices were stable for 36 hours, which gave me hope that we might also achieve world peace by next Tuesday, but as I drove around this afternoon, I could see they were starting to destabilize once more. They are in fact still heading downwards, and that is good, but I also hate the feeling that we are being manipulated by Big Business, or the government, or the oil- producing Arab nations, or some combination of all of these, to react with a particular behavior as a result of these penny-per-gallon bones that are being thrown our way. In the meantime, the stock market is headed in the same direction as the gas prices, which is good for the gas prices but very bad for the market.

I am already far enough into my work that my lovely cruise is a distant memory. That's why I am enjoying the opportunity to relive it day-by-day on this blog.

Friday, 5:54 - I am sitting in my favorite spot on my couch; my feet are up and there is a nice cold Black Russian on the end table within easy reach. It was an all day trial and it was intense and it is not finished yet. I am beyond tired. My best boy cat is tucked against my side, and for a brief, inebriated moment, all is well with the world. My wonderful husband brings me a cup of mushroom and barley soup, perfectly heated, and I savor the flavor. Life is good.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Nachtmare

Scene: Transylvania, 1974. The Voice: Teri Garr as Inga, rushing in to the bedroom of Dr. Frederick "Fronkensteen", proclaiming "Doctor! You were having a Nachtmare!"

Yeah, tell me about it, Inga. Last night was a double-feature doozy. And while it certainly wasn't as bad as, say, the nachtmare experienced by Ebenezer Scrooge, it was bad enough. I have had nightmares on and off my entire life, but I truly have not had one in years. I can only guess I was making up for lost time.

In the news: Well, turns out it really was Weiner's wiener. Politicians, what can I say?

Politicians are among those who sometimes believe the rules don't apply to them, according to psychologists and sociologists who study behavior. They say the self-confidence politicians must exude to succeed can lead them to believe they are invincible, and ego can lead them astray. (I lost the link, I think it was from the LA Times)

Just in case anyone has forgotten, Weiner's wife is a senior aide to Hillary Clinton, and has worked with Mrs. Clinton since 1996.

Monday, June 6, 2011

Back in the saddle

I think Google went a bit nutsy in my absence. Checking the stats on the blog, it seems that on a single day last week there were 1,168 page views of one single blog post - "I have a dream" from May 11 - and all the readers were coming from Turkey. I don't get Turkey. I understand Norway and Australia and the UK, but I don't get Turkey. I really think Google had a major hiccup, or Al Qaeda was trying to hack my blog because they didn't like my "Osama in Hell" series. Either way, my numbers are freaking skewed now. Aw, nuts.

We made it to Publix. Sunday night dinner is going to be chicken with smokehouse maple seasoning and dijonnaise. No idea how this will come out. Also throwing together carrots, sweet potatoes, and bananas. No idea about that either. Sauteed chicken livers and onions. Yum. And if I still have the energy - and this may have to wait to tomorrow - my newest version of stuffed mushrooms. I've made countless versions of stuffed mushrooms, from the basic garlicky bread crumbs to shrimp and marinated mozzarella. What I've got in mind has a combination of flavors that always pleases. UPDATE: I cooked the following - The Devil is in the Chicken; Don't Make a Tsimmes Over It; and Chicken Livers Provencal. My food critics approved. Please check the recipe blog for the June 5th entries, and I hope you enjoy them.

I was pretty news-starved while on the cruise, not having access to my online newspapers and such. Now that I'm back online - wow, what a fertile source of blogging topics! I don't even know where to begin. Okay, you talked me into it: Sarah Palin and Paul Revere. I mean, you can't make up stuff like this. And then Germany pointing the finger at Spain for E. Coli tainted cucumbers, which virtually destroyed the Spanish economy in about 2 days. In the meantime, it is starting to look like it is bean sprouts from Germany that are spreading the rather nasty bacteria. When I was in high school, I happily studied bacteriology, and E. Coli was a favorite - to study, not eat. E. Coli was probably the first recipient of my early cooking attempts, as I made a special brew of nutrient agar for it to feast upon.

Shaquille O'Neal is retiring. A volcano erupted in Chile (are you watching the news, Harold?) Food Network is starting the new season of The Next Food Network Star. Happy to say that Howie, the guy whose lights I wanted to punch out, went home. Next week I hope to see that Penny chick go home. If she spouts "sexy!" one more time, I'm gonna heave. The market is still heading south, and as I've said somewhere on this blog before, we are taking the rest of the world down with us.

Penny the Purple People Eater ... next to go?

Something I forgot to mention - during the cruise, I did finish knitting the baby hoodie AND the cat's paw scarf. For the first time in a long time, I feel like I am making progress in knitting.

More blogging from the cruise:

May 30, 2011
8:25 am - Memorial Day

Twang that magic twanger, froggie

Room Service
Why have I never thought to do this before? Coffee for me, juice and hot tea for Rob, and no need to put on a bra and leave the room in order to reach that state of caffeination which permits me to minimally function. Absolute genius. Later, when my eyes are open and my breathing is back on automatic, I will be sufficiently awake to do my eyebrows and brave the outside world.

This ship has a forward camera which broadcasts in real time so we see where we are heading. Right now, for the first time since leaving Florida, we can see land on the horizon - Cozumel, Mexico. Once we dock, Rob and I will head out to our air-conditioned bus for a "scenic ride to Playa Mia Grand Beach Park" where we will "learn the art of cooking traditional Mexican cuisine from a prestigious Chef." We get to eat our creations accompanied by some Mexican wine, followed by an hour of beach time.

This is our second trip to Cozumel; first time was ten years ago on our first cruise on the Carnival Imagination. That trip was the brainchild of my dear friend Bethe. Up until that time, we had never cruised before. Rob, Cory and I opted for the shore excursion to see the Mayan Ruins of Tulum, and it was a wonderful experience. Our original plans for that Thanksgiving vacation were to repeat our 2000 trip to The Buccaneer resort in St. Croix - we had, in fact, booked the suite almost a year before - but then 9/11 happened, and no one in their right mind was flying anywhere for any reason. Bethe's idea was that both families would cruise over the holiday - no cooking for either of us, and our boys, then 13 and 11, could share a stateroom, and we would stay out of airplanes until the horror lessened. It was such a good idea, we cruised with them the next year on NCL to Nassau, and then came the trips to Italy and Greece ... but those are definitely a couple of other blog posts.

I was perusing today's issue of "Fun Times" and noticed there is going to be a Big Hair Contest tonight. Damn, and I just cut my hair! I coulda been a contender!

5:07 pm
Back from our shore excursion, and we are tired but what fun we had. The bus trip was comfortable and not too long. Our class was a total of eight people, four couples, and all of them good companions. Chef Luis was a terrific teacher, and did I mention that this class included prodigious amounts of booze? Margaritas, daiquiris, piña coladas, wine . . . we were still sober enough to prepare a three course meal. Mini "Huaraches", Veracruz Style Fish Filet, and Rice Pudding Tower for dessert. We also learned how to properly use a tortilla press, and how to make those really cool designs on the dessert plates using heavy cream and raspberry sauce. Awesome!

If you are a parent, then you know that from the minute your child comes into your world, life as you know it is over. We stopped being Rob and Cindy and became Cory's parents. Our activities, our interests, our choices for restaurants and vacations were all undertaken with his preferences in mind. And that becomes a happy habit, so much so that when he "aged out" we found ourselves missing his presence, and half of our conversations still are about Cory. Cory would like this, or love this, or enjoy this, we say, and there is always that regret that he is a little too old to tag along with Mom and Dad, and that he has a work and class schedule that requires his presence at home. But we know he would have been crazy about this particular ship, and all of the food including the 24 hour availability of pizza and ice cream. Cory and I are night owls, and long after Rob is sleeping peacefully, we are wandering around the house, snacking or, in Cory's case, eating a full dInner. Sure enough, when he has accompanied us on cruises, he and I can be found wandering the halls, ice cream or pizza or coffee in hand. Rob has pointed out more than once this trip that Cory would really enjoy the sight of lovely young ladies in evening gowns or (even better) itsy bitsy teeny weeny bikinis.

We saw some of these bikini-clad cuties on our shore excursion, after the cooking class was over and we had eaten the fruits of our labor. We had some time to kill and so we sat near the beach at Playa Mia. I knit the Cat's Paw scarf, Rob read science fiction, and we both people-watched. Gosh, we were brutal. Hee hee. But come on, folks, some blocky, bleached blonde in a bikini (so everyone could admire her tramp stamp) and a chubby dude with a beach ball for a belly, wearing a Speedo, for heaven's sakes, should be ashamed of themselves. Forget the fashion police, those two should have just turned themselves in.

6:38 pm
We are officially back at sea, headed for Roatan, an island off the coast of Honduras. I thought there was some kind of political crisis going on in Honduras. Guess we'll find out tomorrow!

Which reminds me - if Harold Camping had half a brain, he could have looked like a bloody prophet by pointing out that terrible events like the earthquake and nuclear disaster in Japan, the flooding near New Orleans and Memphis, and the tornadoes in Joplin, Missouri were all tied to the End Times. Natural disasters have, at least in my perception, been increasing in frequency and degree of damage especially over the past decade. Haiti, Indonesia, Iceland - I remember viewing the streets of Kissimmee after the hurricanes of 2004 and thinking, "this is what streets look like after a nuclear explosion." Then there are the sudden, explosive political events cropping up worldwide, and economic meltdowns like what has happened in Greece. If I were a half-cracked scam artist like old Harold, I could have made even bigger bucks by tying all these events together in one neat prophetic package. A good preacher can take any event and use it to prove his point through Biblical writings. Harold is just not that good.

10:16 pm
Whoo hoo, this ship is rocking. Literally. I think this will rock me to sleep later tonight but during dinner it leant a weird tilt to the proceedings. Tonight some of the waitstaff was singing and dancing on the tables, which was great fun. Our newly acquired couple is among the missing, but our remaining table mates continue to be good company. One of the husbands has this great soothing voice, like Tom Bodet when he is assuring you he' ll leave a light on.

That's Desirta on the right, one of our waitstaff, practicing for her guest shot on "Dancing with the Stars." Kirstie who?

Dinner was delicious. I even ordered dessert, which was a relief to our waitress who had been fussing over me like a mother hen because I had yet to order dessert.

And the relaxation goes on ...

Saw this on our way out of Playa Mia. There was a girl in the cake, but she left before I could get the shot.

"Animal House", anyone?

Sunday, June 5, 2011

A Weighty Matter

I have to admit that during the entire time we were away, I was a murder trial junkie. While our TV selections were limited, we did have HLN (CNN Headline News) so that even when we were in sunny Mexico, I was watching the Trial of the 21st Century back home. Since arriving home, I have (of course) checked the news, both written and video, and oh boy, this is bad - Judge Perry raised the issue of incompetent counsel as a basis for future appeal if a certain line of questioning is pursued. Apparently Jose Baez "opened the door" to questioning regarding Casey Anthony's felony charges regarding her theft and use of checks belonging to a former best friend, and while the Judge was prepared to allow the state to pursue what would have been devastating testimony for the jury to hear, he did so with the caveat about possible future appeals. There is no doubt that Jose Baez is stepping on the Chief Judge's last good nerve. There is also no doubt that he is an embarrassment to the legal profession.

I would like to know how Giada deLaurentiis grew up eating, at least according to her, copious amounts of Nutella without turning into a very chubby individual. I love the stuff, but it has the same calorie count as butter, so I limit my intake. Like peanut butter, I could eat Nutella out of the jar using a spoon or my tasty index finger, and if I were to indulge in that too frequently, I can only assume I would come to regret it.

Giada and her mother are making (and eating!) Fried Nutella Ravioli.

Speaking of regrets, I have none. About eating, that is. It felt as though all I did was eat for the past seven days, but that was apparently as imaginary as Casey Anthony's nanny, because when I got on the scale this morning, I had lost a pound and a half. Rob is the same weight he was before we left. After the last full day on the ship, when we made sure to try everything we had not drunk or tasted before that, I figured I'd have to be rolled down the gangplank. I guess that perception came from the same part of my brain that fears I am going to wake up one morning 140 pounds heavier than I was the night before.

From our first full day on the cruise:

May 29, 2011

8:52am

There ought to be a law against indiscriminate breeding by annoying people. Look, when there are 4500 people on board, excluding the crew, you have got to indulge in some bitchy people-watching. You can't help it - whiny parents with whiny kids. Morbidly obese women sporting heroic breasts, searching out the legendary "midnight buffet", only to be disappointed by the relatively Spartan nature of the 21st century version. Jeez, lady, you already ate enough to save a third world country from starvation - are you saying that 24 hour pizza, ice cream, and coffee, plus late night snacks of huge hot dogs, hamburgers and French fries is somehow not enough?

Breakfast at "The Gathering". I kept expecting the cast of Babylon 5 to show up.

We are sitting by the window, enjoying a post-breakfast respite, now that the whiny kid has been spirited off for delivery to Camp Carnival. The food has been rather good so far. Ahh ha ha, whiny kid has been replaced by sullen teenager. It's a good thing we never raised a girl.

This morning we are going to check out a cooking demonstration by the Steakhouse chef. The weather is glorious, and sometime today we're going going to sit out on the deck like proper tourists, soaking up sun, sights, and tropical libations. I like this ship!!

Cooking demonstration held in the Chef's Art Steakhouse. That's Rajesh on the right. The fellow on the left better watch his hair extensions; apparently there's a big market for those, and they've become the top target of thieves and ruffians who would do harm to possess them.

We're at the cooking demonstration. We all get samples to taste and they are awesome. A lot of garlic, truffle oil, exotic mushrooms, and mac and cheese to go with a grilled free range chicken breast. A tiramisu to die for. Fun with yum. And recipes to bring home.

More from the cooking demo. I have to admit the creamy mac and cheese tucked under the chicken was awesome and the tiramisu was ethereal.

I don't know if my hearing is going or is merely dyslexic, but I was sure the onboard shopping director was exhorting us to head over to the Burnt Flounder Lounge. Never did find it, but we took our own tour of the ship, checking out the tax and duty free stores and taking pictures from the highest decks. Pretty and mesmerizingly peaceful.

High Noon

So we manage to find some deck chairs in Serenity and settle down to read and relax. I am very proud of the fact that I remembered our hats, even if Rob's does say "Grumpy" on it. But guess what we DID forget? Oh yeah, the sunscreen. Since we are essentially cave dwellers, it is doubtful our fish belly complexions can withstand too much more of this. But the heat feels marvelous and I can put on my Fashion Police hat, which looks a lot like my favorite straw hat, with cheerful anonymity. Like, "Girl, I know you're not pregnant, because if you were, you wouldn't be jiggling like that. I would like to send out a message to my sisters everywhere: bikinis and bellies don't work well together. And guys - I know you CAN take your shirts off, but that doesn't mean you should. If you've got man boobies, please keep 'em covered. If you were a girl, you'd be wearing an underwire bra to support those babies."

Miniature golf on deck

Apparently our cruise director's name is Butch. Cute. Butch, not his nickname. And hyperactive, but I think that is a prerequisite to holding that position. Butch has an assistant named Alan or George or something perfectly normal, but for the purposes of this voyage is wearing the unfortunate sobriquet of Baby Butch.

Hmmm ... I've been on this ship for 24 hours and I have yet to have any alcohol.

Midnight in the Garden of Food and Evil:

Took care of that alcohol thing. I had forgotten just how good the cosmopolitans are on these cruise ships. Tonight was "formal" night, and that means one thing: lobster. Never mind taking pictures in a formal gown, or shaking hands with the Captain - it's about my favorite food, the food I have designated for my last supper. I was actually able to hang up my Fashion Police hat for one evening.

When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie ...

Dining onboard is always an adventure. We acquired another couple at the table tonight. The gentleman apparently hates the city of Atlanta, which ought to be a crime. Our maitre d' sounds like Bela Lugosi. The entire waitstaff sang "That's Amore!" which was especially sweet because they are all Filipino. It was a good night.

From our table - Gloria, Ilia, and Bob

Tomorrow we dock at Cozumel, and we're going ashore to participate in a Mexican cooking class. No Mayan ruins for us this stop, unless I burn something.

If you have ever sailed on Carnival, then you know that all of their ships, regardless of size or age, are essentially the same. This is a good thing, as far as I am concerned. Think about it - it helps to know that Deck 5, the Promenade Deck, has all the shops on it, plus affords access to all the stairwells and elevators, front to aft, without interruption. You can always orient yourself on Promenade Deck to find where you are trying to go. At the same time, each new generation of ship has something even better to offer to guests, and the Carnival Dream is at the top of the food chain. An example is again, Deck 5, where in addition to unfettered interior access, there is an uninterrupted exterior deck wrapped around the ship. This is where the Lanai is located (good eats, plus a couple of whirlpools) and you can enjoy a stroll or jog without having to climb to the nosebleed section on Decks 13 and 14. The ship has also incorporated bells and whistles that were first seen on ships built during the previous decade.

Each ship does adopt it's own theme. When Rob and I were on the Carnival Triumph in late 2008, it was the Great Cities of the World theme, with dining rooms and lounges named accordingly. On the Carnival Dream, it was about the color red, which was weird. The Scarlet Dining Room, the Crimson Dining Room, and the ~~Burnt Flounder~~ Burgundy Lounge. Weird.

Also weird - we just got back, but I've got to bust a move and finalize our plans for Little Rock. Somehow I let it get past me just how soon the departure date was coming up.

I have to make a trip to Publix and do some cooking to feed the family, and I think I'll take an opportunity to participate in my self-styled "I can make it better" recipe contest. As I had said throughout the trip, the food was really good. Having said that, there were a few dishes that I tried (or in one case, had Rob describe to me) that I felt I could definitely do better. One of those was the Cream of Sun Ripened Tomatoes with Herb Croutons. My creamy tomato soup is better, in my humble opinion, and I have provided the recipe over here.

The other recipes that I have, or can do better: West Indian Roasted Pumpkin Soup; Assorted Seafood, Newburg Style; Baked Eggplant with Mozzarella Cheese (an appetizer), served with a green pea fondue and Romesco sauce; Baked Alaska; Stuffed Mushrooms. Not sure which one I'm going to pick to make today - it will, as always, depend on what strikes my fancy once I get inside my favorite palace of provisions.

Saturday, June 4, 2011

Mi casa es su casa, and there's no place like home

Back from our cruise, back from Mexico. It was terrific. As soon as we walked in the door, I put down my purse and landed on the couch. Slept for hours. I'm in between naps now ;-)

As you can imagine, I got a lot of pictures on my iPhone, which I will have to gradually move over to Facebook so I can post them here. I also used my iPad to create blog entries, albeit offline, and those have to be moved over here by a multi-step method that is awkward but necessary. I had no time to set up 3G on the iPad before we left, but I did have wi-fi capability - however, one pricing area where the ships are absolutely mercernary is with their internet access, and I just could not bring myself to spend it.

Let me just say that I have been waiting my whole life for the iPad. It is everything I have ever wanted or needed in a portable computer. I carry it in my purse. It has 3G and wi-fi. It has sufficient word processing ability, for my needs, on it's Notes app, which comes with the iPad. Before I left, Cory set it up for my and sync'ed it with my iPhone. There's still some more syncing to complete, but the fact it can sync through my main computer, which is Microsoft rather than Apple-based, is a joy. I have all my iPhone apps, and then new iPad apps. Extended battery life. The screen is clear, colorful, and gorgeous. With this, I have no need of a laptop.

One thing I did do when I got home was check my BlackBerry to see what had transpired in the office in my absence. Nothing horrible, or even awful, and all I can say is that I still work with the best group of people in the world.

And the Dallas Mavericks ~~kicked the Miami Heat's sorry asses~~ beat the Miami Heat in Game Two of the NBA Finals. Go Mavericks!

Food was a big part of this vacation, as the number one activity on a cruise ship is eating. We also had the opportunity to take two cooking classes, and having done this for the first time would really love to see the cruise lines do more of it. We can't all afford those wonderful 12 day celebrity chef cruises to Alaska or the Mediterranean or Italy, but I think cruise lines like Carnival can incorporate some more classes and programs into their onboard and offshore schedules. Trust me, there is a substantial audience for this type of thing.

Here's the first blog post from our cruise:

Approaching the Carnival Dream at Port Canaveral, Florida

May 28, 2011
11:30 am

We are in the car, packed and poised to head out to Port Canaveral. The weather is beyond perfect. Since it was raining cats and dogs last night, that is a relief. Speaking of cats and dogs, our Gang of Eight is moping around. Situational depression caused by the sight of the suitcases. By tonight, when they realize they have the entire bed to themselves, they'll be getting over it.

So we've moved onto State Road 528, which gives me a chance to bitch about the name change. As far as I am concerned, this is the Beeline. I traveled on the Beeline every work day for four years as I headed to the DCF Legal office in a particularly funky section of Cocoa. The name of the city seems so innocuous - cute, even - and that is probably true if you limit your exploration to Cocoa Village. But Monroe Center, the truly decrepit facility used by the agency formerly known as HRS, was in a section of town so horrible, even the drug dealers did not hang out there after dark. So riding to work on a road called the Beeline, marked by signs sporting a cute little bumblebee, took away some of the sting - ha ha- of practicing law in a condemned building while paying law school loans that raised my personal debt ceiling into the stratosphere.

And then, several years ago, somebody proposes renaming it to the "Beachline" because - are you sitting? - it takes you to the beach! Dude, all the roads into Brevard County take you to the beach! From whimsical and charming to merely utilitarian - beach line . . . Sounds like a BMT subway line, and twice as boring.

Casual Dining on Lido Deck - "The Gathering" - Silly name, good food

So we took this boring road all the way to the beach and beyond and now we are on the ship, which is anything but boring. This is our fourth cruise, and our third on Carnival, and this is the most amazing ship so far. I took some pictures, but won't be able to upload them until we return home. The ship is pretty new and tricked out like Mrs. Astor's pet horse. Embarkation was reasonably painless. Hot and cold running food, drink, and music, and we're still sitting in port. I could get used to this.

Pool area, aft deck

The other pool area on the forward deck, with crazy slide and "Serenity" area on upper decks

Rob and I took a stroll on the upper decks and found a child-free zone, called "Serenity." Very nice place to sit with your sweetheart in the whirlpool or in those special wicker chairs for two while clutching a cold drink sporting fruit salad on a stick or a paper umbrella. There is something so inoffensively festive about a drink wearing that paper bumbershoot, especially if it contains some of that there Kickapoo joy juice with a splash of something sweet and fruity. I've yet to have a Cosmo thusly embellished, and I'm wondering if I could enjoy it even more, decked out like Carmen Miranda, when I already enjoy it so much. Post gastric bypass, it just takes half a drink for me to slide into the toasty zone. Wheeeee!

4:26 pm

And the Carnival Dream is is moving gently out of Port Canaveral . . . (click on the link for more info on the ship)

Port Canaveral from the ship - just left of middle on the horizon, you can see Kennedy Space Center

Our first night out, we met our table mates - Denise and Terry from Indiana, and Gloria and Bob from Oviedo - and our wait staff, Ilia (I think - I could never see her name tag well enough) and Desirta. I actually enjoy the traditional cruising dinner experience, which now that I think of it goes back to my summer vacation days at Kutsher's in the Catskills, when you were assigned to a big table with a bunch of strangers and made a whole bunch of new friends. First night dinner I chose the tomato soup and the tilapia. The tilapia was delicious, nice and moist (tilapia can dry out if you're not careful) and the tomato soup was good, but - I can make it better. I'll even give you the recipe over at the recipe blog. Rob ordered the St. Louis spareribs (which I ordered the last night) and they were incredibly good. The St. Louis-style rib is my favorite cut of slab rib, but difficult to find. These were expertly prepared.

Although I missed my furry babies, I managed to sleep well; in fact, except for the small, noisy and inconsiderate group of young ~~hoodlums~~ adults who created minor disturbances at 3 am, I slept through the night and but for two of the nights, did not need any OTC assistance.

Our room steward was Ricardo. Like our wait staff, he was kind, efficient, and extremely personable. A good crew can make or break a cruise, and I don't think there was one person working there who did not enhance the experience.

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Mind Blowing

I am officially on vacation! I am also for the first time, blogging from an iPad. The convenience is amazing. The size of the keyboard relative to the instrument is amazing. I got this because my laptop suffered an embarrassing end to an illustrious career (one of the cats peed on it, and the insides sort of fried) and I really wanted something smaller than even my carefully chosen Acer. This does seem to suit my mobile computer needs.

Despite this, I won't be blogging while we're away, as the cost for accessing online service is prohibitive. I am going to try to take some offline notes for later publication, but I may decide to remain completely incognito like my Aunt Ceil. Take my word for it, I will be having a wonderful time.

To all of our veterans, please enjoy this Memorial Day, with great thanks from all Americans. We thank you and honor you for your sacrifices and your service to this country and it's citizens.

Friday, May 27, 2011

Touching the Adventures and Perils

Soon I will be sailing on a ship, a BIG ship. Big ships used to be my business, mammoth behemoths so big that they were never referred to as mere boats. These were VESSELS. Ocean-going, bluewater hulls, plying the seas with cargoes of every imaginable type. Great Lakes vessels, moving ore and other bulk between ports in that insular environment. OBOs, Ro-Ros, Lo-Los, container ships. Passenger ships. Fascinating stuff, even though I worked the insurance end of it. Unlike the rest of insurance, this marine insurance was great stuff, steeped in history, and replete with the high-falutin' phraseology of another era.

The SS United States and the SS America

The stately policies, used all over the world, owed their classy-sounding language to the great-granddaddy of all insurers, Lloyds of London. "Touching the adventures and perils which we the assurers are contented to bear and do take upon us in this voyage: they are of the seas, men of war, fire, enemies, pirates, rovers, thieves, jettisons, letters of mart and countermart, surprisals, takings at sea, arrests, restraints, and detainments of all kings, princes, and people, of what nation, condition, or quality soever, barratry of the master and mariners, and of all other perils, losses, and misfortunes, that have or shall come to the hurt, detriment, or damage of the said goods and merchandises, and ship, &c., or any part thereof."

Turns out the inclusion of "pirates and rovers" in the perils clause was more than just a nod to olden times, but back in 1981, the idea of pirates plying their anti-social trade across the high seas was merely amusing. Pirates in this day and age? And those letters of mart, countermart, and K-Mart? Sure, we were young and silly and enjoyed a good giggle. Now that I am old and decrepit and dead serious, I do worry about Pirates of the Exotic Western Caribbean sneaking up behind us in line at the midnight buffet. That would surely put a damper on what promises to be a swell time.

Arrrrr ....

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Decisions

My friend and co-counsel Charles and I were chatting briefly after hours and he asked me if I was already packed for my cruise. Well, his friendly question unintentionally sent me into an emotional tizzy, because not only am I not packed yet, I still haven't decided what knitting projects to take with me. Okay, I thought about packing early for the cruise - and then I laughed at the thought. My idea of packing early is doing it the night before I go on a trip, instead of waiting until that morning. My excuse is that if I pack too early, like a couple of days or even a week, it gives the cats too much time to freak out over our impending absence.

If you travel, and you have cats, then you know what happens when you set an open suitcase on your bed.

For the last few weeks I have been noodling around on what knitting projects to take on the cruise, and I'm still undecided. I really really really want to finish the baby hoodie and matching blanket, but I need to finish the Cat's Paw Scarf so I can move on to my favorite summer project, socks. I've already got four or five different sock projects on needles in varying stages of completion and I have to finish them before I can try some of the new patterns that have caught my eye. UPDATE: I'm going to take all of them. Well, not all of the socks, but at least one or two along with the baby stuff and the scarf. Heaven forbid I should run out of projects while I am in the one place I cannot run out and buy some yarn.

Getting there ...

I've also been seriously contemplating whether I need to bring my own supply of Hershey's kisses on the cruise. Don't laugh. Lack of chocolate caused a minor crisis in Korea, and since then I've always brought my own wherever we traveled. And while a cruise is not a place normally lacking in food, my eating habits are kind of odd. It is going to be tough enough not having ready access to Diet A&W Root Beer.

Speaking of emotional tizzies:

DCF Agency Cuts Nearly 500 Jobs

This can't be good. By the way, Governor Voldemort campaigned on a promise to CREATE jobs. Call me crazy, but I think by cutting 500 DCF jobs, he is breaking his promise.

Gov. Rick Scott and $69.7 billion budget tanking with Florida voters

Gov. Rick Scott is increasingly unpopular with Florida voters, and a majority don't like the $69.7 billion budget the governor will sign Thursday that cuts funding for schools, health care and the state's social safety net, a new poll has found.

A new Quinnipiac University survey released Wednesday found 57 percent of voters disliked Scott's job performance compared with 29 percent who approved — worse than his 48 percent-to-35 percent disapproval rating in the school's April poll. The results are the worst rating for any governor in the 10 states that Quinnipiac surveys.

Let me ask this question one more time: who actually voted for this dude? What the heck were you thinking when you voted for him? Does Florida really need it's own Rod Blagojevich-like drama?

On to happier topics ... so Rob and I set sail in just 3 days, and if ever two people needed a vacation, it is us. I am so looking forward to this, I don't mind all the crazy last-minute catching up stuff I'm doing in the office to make my absence as smooth as possible. It helps that I work with an exceptional group of people.

So I headed to the Hurston Building to attend a training I can't attend tomorrow in my own office because I have a TPR trial scheduled. Which put me nicely nicely near Colonial Drive, and the new Hobby Lobby.

New -- Hobby -- Lobby -- in -- Orlando!!!

I wasn't sure exactly where it was, and thought it might have taken over the space vacated by the late, lamented A.C. Moore, a terrific crafts store with the best selection of Red Heart yarn ever. Plus a lot of other good stuff. But as I drove east on Colonial, I noticed a sign for Hobby Lobby at the open air mall whose name I can never remember. So I pull into the parking lot, and realize the juxtaposition of the Hobby Lobby with a Starbucks and Toojays. Right across the parking lot from each other. Whoa. This is too good to be true. For just a few moments, I was so suffused with joy that I forgot about Govenor Voldemort and my ever-decreasing paycheck.

So I bought myself a new row counter widget, and size 9 rosewood needles, some new kind of knit clip for holding seams in place while you sew them together, and a zipper for the hoodie. And a brand of chocolate I can only find in Hobby Lobby, which is why I usually stock up when I'm in Little Rock and Panama City Beach. Nothing feels as good to a knitter's hands than rosewood needles.

It's the little things that make my day.

By the way, while watching Nancy Grace (mea culpa) and "Criminal Minds" (unrelentingly violent) I finished the baby hoodie. For a while though, I have been suspecting that the arm length is not sufficient, and I was right. Fortunately, I did not seam the arms, so I can frog them back a bit and do-over ... sort of like that Harold Camping dude is trying to pull with Apocalypse Later Not Now routine.

Will somebody please slap Casey Anthony and tell her to drop the Angelina Jolie imitation? That pouty-lip look isn't helping your case, toots. But then neither is your defense attorney.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Doozy

The rest of this work week is gonna be a doozy. You know how it is when you are taking a vacation, and plan on being out of the office for more than a day or two ... the good news is that I'll be leaving my office Blackberry at home, because no one is going to be able to reach me out there on the high seas ... the bad news is, no one is going to be able to reach me, so when I return I'm going to have to deal with a couple of hundred emails. Normally, I check the Blackberry several times a day, whether it is a weekend or a local vacation, because I don't like surprises and would rather take a few minutes to deal with any issues right there and then. But starting Saturday, and for the entire following week, I am going to be in a Dead Zone, sort of like that strip of Irlo Bronson Highway where almost all of the restaurants and businesses have closed down. Now that's a cheery thought. No really, it is.

The other good news is that I do not practice in Orange County and therefore have no reason whatsoever to be anywhere in the vicinity of the Orange County Courthouse, because Tuesday is the day that the Casey Anthony murder trial begins. If you are a local, you know more about this case than you ever wanted to know. If you are not local, consider yourself lucky, because this has been dragging on for almost three years, sucking the life out of the court system and the media. Also consider yourself lucky that you are not one of the 17 people who are going to be sequestered for the next two months. This jury of 12, with alternates, was chosen from a pool out in Pinellas County, in an attempt to find jurors who had not been inundated by the never-ending news reports. It took eleven days to complete jury selection under the watchful eye of Ninth Circuit Chief Judge Belvin Perry. Now these folks are coming to Disneyworld, so to speak, except they're not going to be able to see Mickey Mouse. Or the evening news, for that matter.

The grieving mother

I have two half day trials of my own this week, involving no juries and no media blitz. That's the way I like to practice law. Flying under the radar. That doesn't mean I won't be following the Casey Anthony trial ... it just means I'm damn glad I'm not one of the participants.

Which moves me towards another topic - television ads for lawyers. I hate them. Same thing with billboards. Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think attorneys should involve themselves in that sort of advertising. It just seems so very demeaning to our profession, which has already taken more than a few shots over the years. Some of those attorneys develop a REALLY big head over time. If you live in Orlando/Kissimmee area, I think you know exactly who I mean. You simply can't miss his REALLY big head.

Back to attorneys with REALLY big heads - well, Jose' Baez has given his opening statements in the Casey Anthony murder trial. Let me just say that there was nothing reasonable about the doubt he was trying to create. It was a fairy tale for the jury, but if he can't prove his assertions, his client is going to the Big House. The only way I think he can even try to prove what he claimed he could prove during opening would be to put his client on the stand. Which would open her to cross examination by one of the state attorneys. Which would guarantee she'd be going to the Big House. Incidentally, I loved the grades that commentator/attorney Mark NeJame gave to Baez ... A- for the first part of his opening, C- for the second part, and an F for his cross examination of George Anthony, the state's first witness. How the hell does an experienced attorney get an F in cross examination? Cross is every attorney's dream ... you can ask leading questions, for one thing. According to another commentator, Baez was all over the place with his cross, and seemed to be totally unprepared. Oh, great. So now Casey is going to have a grounds for appeal: incompetent counsel.

There is no doubt in my mind that my dogs are all geniuses. After all Woody can talk and also takes taekwando. Tuffy spoke two languages! Teena was capable of raising six kittens! And now, Indiana has proven his skills as a spectacular judge of character. We were all sitting and watching the news. When Casey Anthony's face filled the screen, Indiana started to growl and snarl. When the picture changed, he stayed quiet. A few minutes later, they showed a close up of Jose' Baez in the courtroom. Indiana growled and snarled again. When the picture changed, so did his attitude. I told you, that dog is SMART.

Does Harold Camping think we are all idiots? Apparently so, and he has revised his apocalyptic calculations to push the Big Day off until October 21, 2011. Hey Harold, you don't get a do-over! This dude is making a mockery of Christian Biblical prophecy, and making fools out of certain believers.

Oprah Winfrey's last show ... since I never watched her, not once in 25 years, I won't miss her. TV personalities. Feh. They start to believe all the hype about themselves. And in a country where Hollywood performers and sports figures are considered royalty, they can get away with it.

And that is a sorry state of affairs.